Sunday, April 12, 2009

MT2M

Back in 2003, I was really focused on writing contemporary Christian music and leading worship in small churches. The plan was to involve John and Meredith, and eventually Daniel. I wanted us to be akin to a traveling gospel group. If you saw "Smoke On The Water," you already have the picture in your mind.

However, in my grand scheme, we were going to be hip...with it...playing cutting edge contemporary music. Unfortunately, the family band didn't make it much further than a few lunch groups, but I was glad that God placed the thought in my head. You see, after we played at a few luncheons, John and Meredith gained enough confidence to create a band with kids their own age. They both were recruited to play in a band called Water, which led a local church in worship one Sunday. Then, the youth minister at our church decided to put together a youth worship band, and John and Meredith were recruited to be members. John played bass and Meredith sang lead vocals. Meredith eventually dropped out, but John stayed with it. The band became known as Silas and played at various churches around town...and even in a few out-of-town churches. In their prime, which only lasted about 1.5 years, they were as good as any local band. I used to joke that only two of the six members had driver's licenses, but it was true. Those kids were jamming for Jesus.

I tell you this to explain the title of this blog...MT2M. Back when the family band was still a seed in my mind, I came up with a cool name for a Christian band: MT2M...empty (MT) tomb (2M). Get it? It symbolizes why we celebrate Easter. There was no dead body in the tomb on Sunday morning! Jesus defeated death! All Christians celebrate!

The family band was just a stepping stone for other things. John has now played in various bands. He played bass for First West's Portico band several years ago. He and several friends had a band called Halieus, which played in Battle of the Bands in Lafayette. He now plays rhythm guitar in one of the contemporary bands that leads worship at North Monroe. Plus he's in another band called Second Day Jeans...a Jesus band. I'm very proud of him. Meredith chose to take another path. Although she sings beautifully, you'll probably never hear her. She doesn't like singing publically anymore, but I'm proud of her too.

Finally, I leave you with this video. The band, Downhere, wrote this song and it's on their third album. It really gets to the heart of what Jesus did for us. I hope you enjoy it. I met this band a couple of years ago, and I can attest that they are straight-up guys...very talented...very committed to their "family" band.

If anyone is interested, I still have a few baseball caps with MT2M printed on them. I had some printed in an effort to "sell" the family on my wonderful plan. Yeah, I was disappointed that our band never took off, but God had other plans. And since He's in control, I'm okay with that.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Cat-Like Reflexes...Nah...Dog-Like

Duke has the most incredible focus. The other day, while we were doing our usual routine of throwing and fetching, I had an idea. I placed both balls between my boots and turned on my camera to film his response. He never lost focus. He stayed on task.

Eventually, I bent down and picked up one of the balls and acted like I was about to throw it. He never left his position until the ball left my hand. But it's fun to watch him fake to the left and right getting ready for the release.

I love this dog!

Friday, February 13, 2009

How To Define Beauty

Today is my wife's birthday. No, I'm not gonna tell you how old she is, 'cause age doesn't matter. At least, it doesn't seem to affect Angie. Y'see, Angie hasn't aged...much.

Well, yeah, she's a year older than last year...and a little wiser. But if you were to look at photos of Angie from 20 years ago, you'd be hard pressed to notice any differences in today's version. She has what I call "timeless" beauty. So, I thought I'd take a minute to talk about what is "timeless" beauty.

Before I was married, I could look at a supermodel and think, "Wow! That girl is drop-dead gorgeous." Funny thing happens though. Later in life, you see the effects that aging has taken upon that beautiful model. And sometimes, the results aren't very pretty. Maybe it's fast living, not eating properly, not exercising, all of the above...I dunno. But some of those poor ladies let themselves go and it's not a pretty sight.

Sometimes I think that an actress is stunningly good looking. But then, I've seen too many on televised interviews that changed my opinion. Y'know, they open their mouths and prove without a shadow of doubt that they are dumb as a box of hammers. I don't know about you, but I think beauty has to have a brain too. If you're not smart enough to pour pea soup out of a boot without instructions on the heel, you're not pretty.

Another pet peeve of mine is language. My dad used to correct girls if they used profane language. He'd tell them, "It's so sad to see someone as beautiful as you...have an open cesspool on your face." I agree. There's nothing that destroys a woman's beauty quicker than foul language. It cheapens her presence.

Well, I could go on and on. (You're thinking, "No Mark, enough already!") Timeless beauty is a combination of many things and I've only covered a select few. But I'm here to tell you, my wife has timeless beauty. She is prettier to me today than she was when we first got married. I really don't know how she does it; but, somehow, she has found a way to make the hands of time stand still.

Happy birthday, Angie!

Monday, February 09, 2009

A Night To Remember

In 1993, Angie and I joined with some other folks to have a "neighborhood" float in the Krewe of Janus Mardi Gras Parade. Back then, the entry fee was nominal and just about anybody could put together a rinky-dink float and be a part of the parade.

Angie grew up in Mobile, Alabama. Most people don't know this, but Mobile...not New Orleans...is the birthplace for Mardi Gras here in the United States. Granted, New Orleans made it bigger and became the "official" host over time. But Mobile has Mardi Gras parades that rival any city. Well, Angie grew up with big, lavish parades. And in Mobile, the big prize was to catch a Moon Pie. Do you remember the chocolate and marshmallow treat?

For our maiden voyage, we had plenty of Moon Pies, beads, and other seasonal trinkets. Everything was tucked safely away in a large box located at my feet. (By the way, I don't believe they allow food items to be thrown during Mardi Gras here in Monroe, so I'm pretty sure we were breaking the rules. What gets me, though, is I've never seen anyone get in trouble for throwing candy during the Christmas parade.) At any rate, the parade that year began at the corner of Washington and Louisville, next to Super 1 and Michael's, and we were located about mid-way in the parade procession.

Angie stood by John and I stood by Meredith, who was about six years old and needed constant supervision. Well, the funniest thing happened before we turned the corner at Washington and Louisville. I was talking to somebody on our float, not paying any attention to Mere-Monkey. The float turned onto the route and we all hooped and hollered. I looked down at Meredith and I almost had a heart attack. She had bent down, lifted the large box with all her might, and had it teetering on the edge of the float. Everything that we had available to throw that night was about to go crashing down on Louisville within the first five feet of the parade. I lunged and grabbed the box right at the perfect moment. I pulled everything back into the box and set it down. I'll never forget the look on two young kids who were standing there at the corner. Their eyes were as big as saucers because they were about to receive the mother-lode of souvenirs. Instead, they received nothing.

The rest of the parade in Monroe was uneventful. I'll say this though...it's a different sensation to be a bead thrower instead of a bead catcher. I tried to throw the big stuff to kids. I was amazed at how many drunken idiots would snatch beads away from kids. They would act like nuts shoving kids out of the way...for a dollar's worth of beads. I guess I'll never understand.

By the time we reached the bridge, the crowd had thinned. I remember thinking, "Great, we still have a few things left for downtown West Monroe." What I didn't know was the most raucous crowd was waiting for us there. We turned left after the bridge and I saw a huge group of people filling in Trenton Street. I literally could not see a path for our float to pass through. As we inched closer and closer to the crowd, the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. And for good reason...we were entering the most dangerous part of the route. You do the math. The folks there had been partying longer because they were at the end of the parade. At the same time, most of the floats had thrown their best trinkets in Monroe. Not exactly a winning combination.

Several things were thrown at us. I pushed Meredith down and Angie shoved John under the side panels. But there were only a few places we could take refuge on the home-made float. I kept thinking, "Why didn't we buy some chicken wire?" Had the crowd wanted to, they could have overturned our float without much effort. We were clearly outnumbered. But we ran the gauntlet...slowly. It seemed like forever. Drunks screaming at us...throwing souvenirs back at us...scary! I'll never forget how we all went "WHEW!!!" after the parade was over.

That was the only time I've been in a Mardi Gras parade. It'll probably be my last. Y'know, some things can last a lifetime and that experience is still a vivid memory for me. Ironic as it may be, our home-made float was the one that was featured on the front page of the News Star the next day. Believe me, there were tons of nicer looking floats to feature in the news paper, but they chose ours. Perhaps that's the reason the Krewe of Janus doesn't allow neighborhood floats any more.

Here's a copy of the front page the next day. You can't see any of my family in the photo because we were on the other side of the float. Imagine yourself tucked under the side panels as trinkets go whizzing by your head. I can...and I still have nightmares to prove it.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

What Would You Do?

I usually play with Duke three times per day. I'll throw to him for about 10 minutes and then we go inside and let him recover. Due to a previous heart worm issue, he can't run for too long without collapsing. But he won't admit it.

Well, Duke and I went out Friday morning at 7AM to play ball. The temps were in the mid-30's. We played about 10 minutes. He was winded...I was freezing.

Around 8AM, Angie came home from work, put on her pajamas, and started reading her emails. Duke sneaked into my office and went behind Angie. Before you know it, he was poking his head through a tiny opening...looking for an opportunity to get my attention. He was ready to play again. Guys...he had just recovered from the first game.

But tell me, if you had someone fussing at you like this, what would you do?


Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Happy Anniversary!!!



I never thought I could do it, but I did. Last year on January 28th, I posted my first blog. At that time, the site was known only as "pard1959". I didn't have a clue that I would enjoy blogging as much as I have though.

Here's the story of how and why I decided to start this silly thing. One night last year, during the run of "Oscar and Felix", my buddy Matt and I showed up a little early for a show. We had a few minutes to discuss stuff before the party began. What you need to know is a "gathering" happened every night in the dressing room. There were eight folks in the cast...6 guys, 2 girls. Each night we would visit, laugh, and eat snack food before the show began. I've never had more fun during a play!

Well, back to visiting with Matt. I quizzed him about a website he had. He told me it was a blog where he posted original cartoons and other humorous items. As it turns out, I had accidentally created the pard1959 blog back in March 2007, but I didn't have a clue what a "blog" was or what to do with it. He explained to me that I could write stuff, post photos, post videos, or whatever I felt like sharing on the Internet. After the show that night, I re-visited my blog and tried to figure out what I could do with it.

Then, before you know it, the show ended, and I still had entertainment energy bursting inside of me. So, I wrote a story about the show and I uploaded three photos. As they say, the rest is history. I can't remember when I officially changed the name of the blog to "The Cutting Edge of Mediocre"; but when the idea hit me, there was no turning back.

I've toyed around with the idea of pulling the plug on it several times during the year. Y'know, trying to post something meaningful or funny 5 times a week can become burdensome. But for now, I'll keep it going. I told Angie that if anything ever happened to me, this would be a cool way to remember some of my life's stories. But in Angie's dry wit, she responded, "Yeah, but most people usually put in the form of a book." Well, I ain't most people. I'm different. I'm a rebel. I swim against the current. I'm the cutting edge...of mediocre.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

How Do You Define Courage?

What's the meaning of courage?

Is it to fight a bull in a bullring?

Is it to drive a Formula 1 car?

Is it to fly a fighter into combat?

Is it to practice free fall parachuting?

Is it bungee jumping or white water rafting?

Is is to gamble your salary on a coin toss?

Is it to pick a fight with the biggest guy in a bar?

Is it to insult your boss?

Is it to ride on a defective Ferris wheel or put a live scorpion in your mouth?

Bullbutter...that's nothing.

This is courage!


Monday, January 26, 2009

Holes To Prove It

Last week, Cindy brought her new dog to our dinner theater rehearsal. Now, I love pugs. My favorite pet as a child was my pug, King. He was neat dog. I'll tell you about him, though, in another blog.

At any rate, Cindy's little dog, Maggie May, was a rambunctious little thing. Very inquisitive...very playful. We allowed her to get on the table with us at one point. I can attest that Maggie May has needles for teeth. I have holes to prove it...on both of my hands.

Here's a little video of her. The voices you will hear are the other actors reading their parts in our play. Hope you'll come see it when it opens.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

See Ya, You Bum!

If it were up to me, guys that make flagrant, disrespectful fouls like this would sit out more than one game. I hope the coach of his team has some cojones and sits him down for a week or more. It makes me wonder if any of these knuckleheads realize that the "big eye in the sky" is watching every move nowadays.

Poor sportsmanship should not be allowed in college competition.



There was another sports story bothered me this week. I read where two Texas high school girls basketball teams met last week and the outcome was 100 to 0. I learned that the victorious team didn't offer an apology until after the story hit the media in Dallas. Covenant, which considers itself a "Christian" school, was up 59 - 0 at the half! Full court presses...3 point shots...are you kidding me? Are you telling me the coach didn't have enough sense to call off the dogs until they had scored another 41 points. I give credit to the Dallas Academy team for not losing their composure. I've coached in games where the other team was clearly outmatched. When it happened, I pulled back the reins. I certainly didn't let the horses run wild. I've also coached the team which was on the other side of a thumping. Thank goodness, I've never had another coach rub my nose in it like that.

http://highschool.rivals.com/content.asp?CID=903780


So here's what I've got to say to that player above and the coach of Covenant, "See ya, you bum. You don't belong on the courts."

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Is That a Light at the End of the Tunnel?

Or a freight train?

Due to economic upheavals that this nation currently faces, wholesale changes are on the way. Some changes will actually benefit some of us. Other changes will make life miserable for some us. So, on average, it's all good, right? Y'know, if you had one foot in boiling water and the other one in ice cold water...on "average" you'd feel alright. /insert Dr. Evil's voice here/ "Riiiiiiiiight"

Well, back in 2007, New York's attorney general, Andrew Cuomo, announced that he was going to sue one of the country's largest appraisal management companies, eAppraiseIt, and it's parent corporation. Why? Because he had proof that they were allowing one of their client's, Washington Mutual, to hand-pick appraisers who they knew would inflate home values. Hmmmm...

Please read this article for a concise story of how it went down:

http://www.consumeraffairs.com/news04/2007/11/ny_wamu.html

This isn't an isolated instance. I provide you another article about a Seattle law firm that is suing Countrywide and Landsafe for rigging the appraisal process.

http://narblog1.realtor.org/mvtype/appraisalinsight/2009/01/countrywide_and_landsafe_sued.html?&WT.mc_id=LS012109&CAT=App

There are literally more articles out there with similar stories than I could post on my blog. Those two are just random samples. Nice press for appraisers, right?

So, like I said earlier, change is on the way. In what form, you ask? Let's start with the HVCC. The HVCC is the Home Valuation Code of Conduct. Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, both government sponsored enterprises, have decided to adopt the code. Essentially, what will happen is the mortgage loan broker will no longer be able to choose the appraiser for an assignment. Instead, an AMC, will select an appraiser from its list. In theory, the appraisers will come up on a rotating basis and no single appraiser will receive more than another. That's good and that's bad. Here's why.

First, if you're not on the AMC's approved list...perhaps one that has a contract with a large lending institution...then there's no way in the world that you will ever get work from that lender again. Not on the list, S.O.L. And I can't help but wonder...did we learn anything from eAppraiseIT's infamous list? Does everyone get to be on the "list"?

One thing's for certain. If you are on the list, you'll be guaranteed work. Yeah, should be. But here's the caveat. For the "right" to work with the AMC, you have to offer them a discount on your appraisal fee. Typically, appraisers in our market earn $300 to $400 for an single family residential appraisal now. But with the AMC, they want the appraiser to accept between $200 to $275 per assignment. Ouch! That's gonna leave a mark.

In our market, like it is in most markets I presume, the Pareto Principle is in effect with regard to market share. The Pareto Principle, in case you're not familiar, states that roughly 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes. You may have heard it called the 80/20 Rule or the 80/20 Principle. It actually can be a pretty accurate "thumbnail" look of most things, though. Take for instance our market here. I think it would be safe to say that roughly 80% of the appraisal work goes to about 20% of the appraisers.

Pop quiz time. If you've read my previous blogs about appraisals/appraisers you should be able to answer this without looking back. What one word is used by the lenders and Realtors to describe the appraisers in the 20% bracket? Come on, you can do it. Are you still thinking? Times up. The answer: good. So, doing my best impression of President Clinton, "It depends on what the meaning of the word "good" is." Maybe we should delve deeper into this.

I recently spoke with a lady who claimed to be a former appraiser. She also said she presently was a Realtor; although, she was working in another profession when we talked. She asked about my workload and I told her that it had been pretty lean lately. I explained that I expected things to change when the HVCC is officially adopted. She looked perplexed and asked, "What's the HVCC?" After explaining what is was, she looked at me and said something to the effect of, "Who thought of that? That doesn't seem right." I then hopped up on my soapbox and said that not everyone got to "share the wealth" when all the appraisal work was rolling in. Again, she looked perplexed and said, "Well, if you're a good appraiser, you should get plenty of work." I should have nodded my head in agreement and left it at that. But nooooooooo! I couldn't.

Me: "So, what makes a 'good' appraiser?"

Her: "You know, one that gets his work in on time."

Me: "That's it?" /waiting patiently for the truth to come out/

Her: "Yeah, and one that will appraise the property for whatever it's selling for."

Me: "So you're saying that a good appraiser should always "hit" the number?"

Her: "Yeah."

The conversation went on for a while longer, but you get the point. It doesn't matter if the Realtor calculated the square footage wrong or if the house has issues that need addressing. The good appraiser covers things up. Y'know, like a cat in a sandbox. I told her that I could hit the number 99 times out of 100, but if I missed on one...just one...I'd be labeled "conservative", which is tantamount to the black plague in the mortgage industry. You get that? Ninety nine attaboys, but it's the one "oh crap!" that causes the ship to hit the sand. Did that sink in? "Good" appraisers ALWAYS make the deal work. That, my friend, is still a prevalent thought in the real estate industry. When the nation is facing real financial crises...when the multi billion dollar bail out still isn't enough to save us from our own excesses and greed...it appears we haven't learned.

So I ask again, "Is that a light at the end of the tunnel?" Or is it a freight train that's going to plow us under because we're too ignorant to learn from our mistakes?

{This is my seventh submission in a series on the financial crisis here in America. I want this to be an honest account of why we are where we are based on my tiny perspective of the mortgage/housing debacle.}

Thursday, January 22, 2009

I Hear Voices In My Head!!!

Angie brought me a copy of a CAT scan that was performed on a guy last night at the hospital. It shows a cross section of his brain. Now, all kidding aside, this guy wasn't having psychotic visions or hearing voices. However, if he does start hearing things, we now have conclusive evidence that it's real. See for yourself. I've attached a copy of the original CAT scan and a closeup of the area of concern.


The brain


Did you see the face?

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

My Fears Are Real

I was taught that fear was only False Evidence Appearing Real. My fear was after President Obama was elected that the Bush-haters were going to keep on keeping on; and no real healing for the nation was going to take place.

Instead of enjoying the significance of the first black president in America's history, we have hip-hop knuckleheads spewing off. I wish I could tell them to keep their mouths shut so we could assume they're idiots...instead of opening their pie holes and proving without a shadow of a doubt that they are.

If this is what we can expect from Obama's backers, then my fears were not false evidence. This is real. This is real hatred. This is real profanity. This is real stupidity.

I don't condone what you will hear on the video. I found this on a website that I enjoy reading; however, you can find it on Youtube as well. You've been forewarned.


God bless America and rid us of stupidity in every form.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Mentally Irractitated

Some days, all the wind gets knocked out of my sails. Today was one of them. In case you've jumped to a conclusion, it had nothing to do with the Presidential Inauguration. No, life happened today, and I almost hit the canvas with a TKO.

I tried to explain to a friend about a week ago, that my mental condition cycled just like everyone else's. Y'know, highs and lows. But I think I've been looking at it all wrong. I don't think I cycle at all. Cycles have gradual increases and gradual decreases. You're on an upswing for happiness. You're on a downswing for gloominess. Mine aren't like that. Mine are more similar to spikes. Happy day...UPSPIKE! :-) Happy day...UPSPIKE! :-) Sad day...DOWNSPIKE! :-(

I can go from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows...within hours. I don't know how Angie has been able to put up with it for all these years. Really, I don't.

Well, rather than waste your time reading about my misery. I thought I'd offer some unusual photos that Daniel and I took over the weekend. Daniel really has an eye for capturing ordinary things in a very unique way. I, on the other hand, look for interesting things. Either way you slice it, these photos are different.

And just in case you're wondering where in the blue blazes "irractitated" came from, one of the contestants on American Idol used that word to describe what the judges did to her tonight. I think it's a cross between irritated and agitated. I thought it was an appropriate way to describe my current mood.


This started as an ordinary photo of me taken by Daniel. I tried to be creative and made a mosaic. If you don't like, please remember that I had a limited canvas to work with...my face.


Daniel captured the water as it was beginning to boil. I thought the vapors were really cool.


After I boiled the noodles, I noticed one of them had stuck to the bottom of the pot and was standing at attention. Interesting...


Another shot of the noodle

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Seeing Is Believing


This is the family at Six Flags in 1996
before the onset
of the disease.
(John, me, Angie, Dan, Meredith)

In August 2008, I wrote a blog about the medical ordeal that Angie endured when her autoimmune system went haywire. I recommend that you read it if you haven't already. I'm providing a link for your convenience.

http://pard1959.blogspot.com/2008/08/heaven-must-be-little-like-powdered.html

Well, the reason I remind you of this event is because several people have told me that Angie doesn't look like she has aged since we got married. I wholeheartedly agree. In fact, I think that she has grown more beautiful over the years. But when I wrote the story about her in August, I didn't adequately describe what she went through...which was akin to hell.

She began the first chemotherapy treatment the week before Thanksgiving in 1996. In addition to chemo, Dr. McKinley prescribed mega-doses of steroids. She would take 1000 mg of Solu-Medrol, which is a steroid, every time she had a chemo treatment. And, if that wasn't enough, she also took prednisone orally every day.

She would often tell me that the Solu-Medrol treatment was worse than the chemo. It made a metallic taste in her mouth. Add that to the nausea brought on by the chemo and you have a recipe for feeling miserable. It was painful to watch her take the treatments.

Her doctor told me two things were going to happen because of these medications. First the chemo, Cytoxan, was going to cause her hair to fall out. Since we began the treatments in November, he recommended that we go shopping for wigs. He figured she would be bald by Christmas. Second, he said the high doses of steroids were going to cause her to gain weight. He was right on the money on one out of two. She gained weight. Angie never lost her hair, though. Instead, her hair became coarse...perhaps thicker.

Her weight gain was fast. High doses of steroids can make the body bloat. Not to mention that it increases your appetite. During 1997, Angie would say things like, "I can eat everything on my plate, and I can eat the plate, and I can eat the table." It was so sad. She would go to the grocery store and come back in tears. The reason...no one recognized her anymore. She passed an old friend in Brookshire's one day and the friend didn't know who she was. She didn't look like the Angie most of us are accustomed to seeing. She had the classic pumpkin head syndrome that people on high doses of steroids usually get. If you saw Jerry Lewis a few years back, you'll know what it looks like. He took prednisone for a pulmonary disease and the drugs caused his face to balloon.


Jerry Lewis

Back to Angie. She took prednisone in varying doses for 16 months. Over time, Dr. McKinley carefully and slowly weaned her from the medications. She was so delighted to be off of the prescriptions. Unfortunately, she had gained a lot of weight. But, if there's one thing that God gifted Angie with, it's determination. She made a plan to lose the weight. First, she went on the "Nomo" diet. If you remember, back in the mid 90's, Hideo Nomo was pitching for the L. A. Dodgers. So everyone thought she was eating some low-cal Japanese regime. No, it turns out she made the decision to eat no-mo, er...I mean, no more, food.

Second, she began exercising. At first, she couldn't walk to the end of the street without being winded. Little by little, she increased her walking distance. Then she started running. Run a block, walk a block. Eventually, she was running over 2 miles. Now you know who authored my routine, huh?

The weight started peeling off and she began feeling better as the months went by. Before you know it, she was back to normal. Now I don't want to make it to sound like it happened magically. It didn't. It came by hard work and dedication. But that's Angie. She's no light-weight (pun intended).

As they say, seeing is believing. For those who think Angie looks like she did 25 years ago, you're right. But take a gander at what she had to go through in order to get back to her slender, beautiful self. What a girl!


After the first chemo and steroid
treatment, Christmas 1996


Daniel's birthday party
May 1997


Her parents' anniversary
June 1997


July 1997


Angie 2007